A picture of a cow dancing in a picture, an advertisement for ice cream; a man setting himself on fire; a road blocked by sheep; a broken wooden footbridge slewed into the stream it's built to cross; red plush drapes trailing into cold coal ash; prawns frying in oil; limes, pears, an exercise bike, oranges and raspberries each reflected in a poorly-made stack of mirrors against a damp wall; a picture of a cow dancing in a picture, but not this picture; now wash your hands; the cow and its barely-portrayed field do not exist; keep left; it is an advertisement for ice cream; keep right; why would the cow dance? Please shut the door.